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Throwing Out the Rule Book

Please join me by reading the daily meditation from “The Language of Letting Go” by Melody Beattie and share your thoughts in the comment space provided at the end of this post (Click on the Read More button to read the complete thought for the day).

Growing up in an alcoholic home provided an environment where there were rigid rules or no rules at all.  This lack of stability in my environment lead me to not trust life or my ability to manage my life. This feeling of being out of control lead me to make up some rules to live my life by.  Such as rules like, “I will always or I will never”.

In spite of the rules I attempted to live my life by, I continued to make mistakes.  In point of fact, this rigid set of rules did not serve me any better than the rule book of my parents.  Still, it took me years to throw out the rule book that I wrote for myself as a child and modified as an adult.   Eventually, I did learn that I could manage my life much better when I just learned from the choices I made instead of attempting to control myself or my environment.

The Serenity Prayer which states “God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I can not change, the courage to change the things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference” best defines the shift from a control based lifestyle to a faith based lifestyle that I attempt to live my life by now.  Thanks to living my life according to the Serenity Prayer, I have grown and changed and I no longer have to let the rule of my parents or my own rules limit my ability to live my life and trust my ability to handle situations.  In point of fact, I have learned to replace my need to control with a genuine awareness of my surroundings and my feelings so that I learn from the choices that I make.

Today: I do not look at my choices of today or of my past as mistakes, instead now I look at my choices and their consequences as useful information for the next choice that I make.  This allows me to live a life  based upon trust of myself instead of the fear of making a mistake.

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Diana Smith, PhD, LPC-MH owns and operates Serenity Mental Health Services and is licensed by the National Board of Certified Counselors. License number is LPC-MH2025 and she follows the ethical guidelines described by the NBCC found at their web site Diana is a member of the National Board for Certified Counselors, Certification Number 43911. In addition, she is also a member of the American Counseling Association, Member ID# 5140627. Online counseling can help you right now. Research has made it clear that this manner of offering therapy is effective and those who’ve experienced it have said they would seek it out again.

Dr. Diana is an APA (American Psychological Association) EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) approved Therapist in Training.